Step Inside the Real World

We play the game with determination
We don't give a dam 'bout our reputation baby
It's not a game, it's a revelation
Step inside the real world
The real world...yeah yeah yeah... The real world...yeah...

It's been every day now, and it just won't go away now...no
Life is so intense now, not much common sense now yeah
And late in the night I turn out my light yeah
A song in my head, and it says "STEP INSIDE THE REAL WORLD"

We play the game with determination
We don't give a damn 'bout our reputation baby
It's not a game, it's a revelation
Just another day in the real world...yeah, the real world

I can make decisions with no one else believin' me
I just look inside me 'cause I've got my own voice to guide me
It came in a dream, a light so extreme yeah
A voice in my head, and it says "STEP INSIDE THE REAL WORLD"

Ya gotta step inside the real world STEP-IN-SIDE-THE-REAL-WORLD
I woke from the dream, I know what it means yeah
That voice in my head...It says "YOU'RE HERE INSIDE THE REAL WORLD"

Step inside the real world, inside the real world, step inside the real world...

I've just been catching up on some racing i had taped that i missed when i was out hunting and i miss him so much. The tape i just watched had a tribute to dear old Roo (Rooster Booster) and it was all his wins and it also featured his cheltenham gold cup win, it will never leave me... the commenators were saying "what a horse" "I Can't beleive it" "That brave grey has just made mincemeat of all the best hurdlers in training"... i wish we could have him back again he was a true racehorse - not like Best Mate who only ran 18 races in his life, Roo ran 42 races most with top weights nearly all against the best, yet still he came out and battled his heart out, yet still he tried... But like his owner said "It's racing, he went doing what he loved. It's a great loss but you have to remember the good times, you have to battle on it's what he would have wanted..." I guess what he says is true but going past Hobbs this morning and watching the horses working on the gallops i just had too look away for he was no longer there, and it was the place where it all happened... And then i got asked if i was ok about it... no i'm not he was my hero the one that gave me hope and no one really seems to have acknowledged he's gone... I'll love you forever Roo....

This is for all my darlings now in Heaven's Herd...

It was the night Rod Stewart played
And we were, were standing in the pouring rain
If I had known it was the last time I would see you again...
I would change everything...

I look through the broken glass I watch the storm go through my mind
There's so much I had to say I know the words I left behind
And now I'm caught in a daydream with nowhere to run and hide
The world rushes by me, it's leaving me here all alone
(I would change everything, but I can't do anything
I would give all that I have to know where you are)

I'll always carry you inside my heart and you
You'll never know how much I wonder where you are
I always knew that you would take a part of me away with you
And I never got to say good-bye

I look in the mirror now and all I see is yesterday
At night I hear your voice and it is calling out my name
And with every hour just hold on to what you can
They're lost in a moment and fading away in the night
(I would change everything, but I can't do anything
I would give all that I have just to know where you are)

...and I never..ever...said good-bye...

That night is just a memory
But I still feel you standing next to me
And when I think I hear your voice all I hear is the rain...



For hearing all my doubts so selectively and
For continuing my numbing love endlessly.
For helping you and myself: not even considering
For beating myself up and over functioning.

To whom do I owe the biggest apology?
No one's been crueller than I've been to me.

For letting you decide if I indeed was desirable
For myself love being so embarrassingly conditional.
And for denying myself to somehow make us compatible
And for trying to fit a rectangle into a ball.

And
To whom do I owe the biggest apology?
No one's been crueller than I've been to me.

I'm sorry to myself.My apologies begin here before everybody else.
I'm sorry to myself.For treating me worse than I would anybody else.

For blaming myself for your unhappiness
And for my impatience when I was perfect where I was.
Ignoring all the signs that I was not ready,And expecting myself to be where you wanted me to be.

Well, I wonder which crime is the biggest ?
Forgetting you or forgetting myself...
Had I heeded the wisdom of the latter,I would've naturally loved the former.

For ignoring you: my highest voices.
For smiling when my strife was all too obvious.
For being so disassociated from my body,
And for not letting go when it would've been the kindest thing.